THE SHOCK FAMILY

Just an Update

2012-01-28T22:30:00.003-05:00

Haven't posted a blog in awhile.
Changed the look of the blog.
Had to add a picture of the ocean.
Almost out of January.
Yay!

Here is some of what has been happening in our life...

Christmas was an absolute blur.
We averaged 17 people staying in our 3 bedroom house for 3 weeks straight.
I'm not even kidding.
It was fun... and exhausting... a never ending "Punkie Party".

Kevin, Drew and I went to Passion 2012 in Atlanta.
God spoke to me in so many ways over the course of those 4 days.
I keep thinking I need to share it all with you... just so much to process.
One thing for sure... God is HUGE!

Alayna took this sweet picture of our grandbaby in Florida last week.

Plans are underway for Kevin, me and our kids to go to Haiti.
We have been praying about a "family mission trip" for years.
Can't believe it is going to happen.
March 21-28.
Many blogs to come concerning this whole adventure :)!

Kevin is speaking at a small gathering of precious believers tomorrow morning.
So excited to see our friends.
They are such a blessing.

We have been discussing and praying about what God has in store for She Has A Name this year.
It is just amazing to see so many people coming alongside of us to fight freedom all over the globe.
Oh man... I have many thoughts to blog when it comes to this subject as well.

Dad and Mom are doing well. Took Dad to get a haircut today. He was not at all happy with the $13.50 price. He kept saying they were robbing us. Said it only cost $1.25 in Defiance. Is that true??? Once again the ladies who worked there thought he was too cute :).

I fell down the stairs this afternoon.
Kevin and kids came to my rescue.
Coke spilled everywhere.
Broken glass all over.
Slightly embarrassing.
Is there a law against drinking while walking down the steps?
I'm thinking there should be.
All I could think as I was laying at the bottom of the stairs was...
That's gonna leave a mark!

Alright...
Time to watch a movie with the kids.
Alayna will make some popcorn maybe :)???
Just asked her.
She literally just said "maybe".
That's too funny.

Addicted?

2011-12-22T17:25:00.000-05:00

We were all sitting around the kitchen table last night when it happened.
I was called out for my addiction.
Actually, I think our whole family was called out on it.

The conversation was about what it means to have an addiction. Our young friend, who was sitting at the table, said very bluntly "I know what your addicted to."

I immediately braced myself for what would come out of her mouth next...

Sugar? Yes.
Caffeine? Yep.
Chocolate? Of course.
Sleep? Probably.

Then it came out...

"You are addicted to God."

Yes.... it's true.

I am absolutely addicted to God.

Just looked up the definition of "addicted".
Smiled when I read it.

ad·dict·ed/əˈdiktid/

Adjective:

Physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects.
Enthusiastically devoted to a particular thing or activity.

Thought it was funny when she first said it.
She believes so differently than our family.
To her... we look crazy addicted.

Then today, the more I thought about it, the more I realized....

It is actually a whole lot more than just an addiction.

JESUS IS MY LIFE.
HE LIVES IN ME.
HE IS MY HOPE.
HE IS MY EVERYTHING.

Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ.
Phil. 3:8

Celebrating The Gift

2011-12-19T14:51:00.001-05:00

Thanks so much for all the kind comments and for your prayers this past week.

In case you didn't know... our sweet 5 month old great nephew passed away 1 week ago today.

Dima Lee Heilshorn

My brother Bob (the grandpa) asked me to speak at the memorial service.

Oh... Can I tell you?

It was so difficult.

But God was gracious to give me the words.

Just wanted to share them with you...

On Wed. night as we sat at the kitchen table with Bob and Jean, Bob told us that he was going to be the one to do the memorial service. I asked him if he was sure that he could handle it. After all, this is his grandchild we were talking about. Maybe we should have someone else step in. He said that Katie (his daughter/the mother) wanted him to do it... and he wanted to honor her.

He then preceded to tell me he wanted ME to help him.

"Who me?"

"Yep... you".

Since Katie had lived with us during her pregnancy, he felt like I would be the perfect person to share about Katie and Dima.

So... here I am. Pretty nervous but... here I am.

Today, I want to give thanks. Thanks to God for the life of our precious little Dima.

His life was short, but oh did it impact so many of us.

God absolutely knew what He was doing when He began to form Dima in Katie's womb.

He was a miracle from the beginning.

Katie came to live with our family in about her sixth month of pregnancy.

Oh how I could relate to her circumstances.

I told her the story of when I was pregnant out of wedlock.

How people would say "It's a mistake".

[You can read more of our story here: It's still hard for me to believe ]
I had a teacher come up to me at a basketball game and tell me that the baby growing inside of me was not a "mistake" -- The sex outside of marriage was the mistake... not the baby.

The baby was a miracle.

It took awhile for her to get used to living in the Shock House.

It took us awhile to learn her lingo... she speaks her own little language for sure :)!

But by the time Dima arrived, they were both part of our family.

Katie and I spent a whole lot of time together.

Dr. appts, a couple of long nights in the ER, chopping veggies for supper,

All while talking about how thankful we were that she was in a safe place.

Sidenote: That girl can clean... she made our fridge just sparkle. As a matter of fact... it needs a good cleaning Katie. You are welcome to come back anytime ;)!!!

I remember how Katie didn't know if she was going to be a good mother.

She couldn't imagine that Dima was actually going to be in her arms.

We all continually reminded her that those kicks were coming from a precious little life growing inside of her.

Katie is one tough cookie. You should have heard her bossing the Dr. around while she was delivering Dima. He was telling me and her mom about a book he had been reading. Katie very firmly told him to "stop talking and get back to work". So funny!

We watched as Dima came into this world.

Watched Katie fall in love with this precious little man.

Watched Bob and Jean become absolutely smitten over their new little grandson.

Watched Aunt Rachel, Uncle Richard, Uncle Josh and Anne welcome the little guy into their family with open arms.

Watched this little guy bring a family closer than ever before.

Katie went from someone who never wanted to hold anyone else's baby, to a protective mother bear with her little cub. Even in the hospital she was instructing all of us seasoned moms on how to hold him.

Again... so funny!

He was such a good baby.

Bob dropped Dima off at our house last week for Alayna to watch him.

I asked him for instructions.

He said "Oh, he has diapers and bottle in the diaper bag"

I replied "Ok.. but when does he need to sleep or eat... and how much?"

He just shrugged his shoulders "When he gets hungry, feed him. When he is tired, he will sleep."

And he was right.

Dima was so content.

Just smiling -- Oh man, did he have the cutest smile from across the room.

A good, good baby.

Such a gift from God.

I remember thinking these last couple of weeks...

Thank you God. Thank you that our family got to be even a small part of your plan to set Katie's life in the right direction and bring little Dima safely into this world.

Then.Came.Monday.

I got the call from Bob.

Dima passed away in his sleep this morning.

What in the world?

My head was spinning.

Heart racing.

Tears flowing.

God... what are you doing?

How can this be?

Where do we go from here?

This is just all so tragic. I've been talking to Katie about what an AMAZING God you are... Now what do I say?

It is so hard to go through something this tragic in the midst of this Christmas season.

Who wants to celebrate? How can I even think about it?

On Thursday... in the midst of the pain, Kevin and I met with our pastor, Brad.

I was just honest with him... with all of these questions.

He said some things that brought light to the darkness.

Brad just told us that when a baby dies, people will ask the question "Did God just create this baby to die?"

The answer to that question is "No".

God created all babies to live.

There is only one baby that was ever born for the purpose of dying.

That baby was Jesus.

He was born to die.

Die for our sins so that we may live.

Jesus was born to die... so that little Dima may live.

We really do, more than ever, have a reason to celebrate this Christmas.

Celebrate that precious little baby born in a manger...

I don't think I will ever look at the nativity scene the same again.

Ever.

God promises that if we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us.

I am praying that in this season...

We will do just that.

Draw near to God.

Put our faith in the one who came to die.

Knowing that as we put our faith in him...

We will have eternal life.

James 4:8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.

18 Years? Really?

2011-12-18T10:20:00.000-05:00

Due to extenuating circumstances, this post is coming a day late...

Oh Drew!

Happy 18th Birthday!!!
(all the exclamation marks are just for you... I know how much you love them!)

Our little "Drewbie Doo"
Or as Aunt Kathy calls you... "Scooby Drew"
Or your dad calls you... "Drewders"
Or Billy..."Jocelyn"... very long story.
Or your cousins... "Gust" (pronounced Goost).... another long story.
Or Kessa... "Uncle Gust"

!8 years ago my life changed forever.
You... our sweet baby boy entered into our lives.

After an emergency c-section...
You were taken to to a hospital an hour away from Defiance.
We were told... "broken blood vessel or aneurism on your brain".
Your dad stood at the other end of the room in tears...
I sat in my hospital bed in shock.

After many tests, they said it was "apnea" and sent you home with us.
The medications made you uncomfortable.
You would just cry and cry.

I will never forget...
All of those long hours in the rocking chair.
Just you and me.
You were my little "Drew Bear"
I would sing this song to you over and over:..

You became quite the chubby kid...
And just about the cutest little man ever!

We all still talk about how you used to come out to the living room in the morning and climb on my lap...kinda crying and say "it's a bootiful day momma".

So cute!

You and your blue blanket and your football nuk -- precious.

And now...
Your all grown up.
A Man.
Still precious.
Still my Drewbie.
I really do try not to call you that when you are on the baseball field....
Just slips out sometimes.

Dad and I couldn't be any more proud of you than we are Drew.
The way you serve others.
Your work ethic when it comes to school and your job.
The way you love your sister?

We are so very thankful for the way you make us laugh...
Your sense of humor is much needed in this family.
I love to watch little Lance just laugh at you...
You are such an amazing big brother to him.

God is going to use you for His Kingdom Drew...
He already is!
I love that you want to be a pastor.
I hate that you come in to our bedroom when Dad and I are fighting and try to give us a sermon about loving one another...
Ok... I don't "hate" it.
I actually am so very grateful that you want your life to count for what matters most.

Tonight... we will sing "happy birthday" and eat a cookie cake to celebrate!

It will be niche (is that how you spell it?)

The Leveraged Life

2011-12-09T08:25:00.001-05:00

Heroes... seems like they are hard to come by today.

Over the years I have asked God to bring older women into my life that can mentor me and "show me how to walk out my faith".

He has been so good to do just that... always at just the right time.

Let me tell you, I can sometimes feel like a misfit in the whole "christian woman" category.
Seems like God has gifted me in ways that just don't seem to fit the mold.

It can make me feel crazy.

Enter into the picture... Shelley Giglio.

Seriously, she is a woman after my own heart.

It all started when God began to reveal Himself to our family in huge ways through her husband.
Somehow, in the midst of e-mailing back and forth with Louie... Kevin and I met Shelley.

When we meet her, we realized quickly that she is so very normal... and yet her faith in God is so very extraordinary.

I have learned so much from her.

I keep telling her she needs to write a book.

The last time I said that, she told me that I should write it.

Ok... now that's hilarious.

Nope.

I can't write a book... it won't happen.

I maybe can write a blog though :)...

Let me just share with you a couple of things (see, I can't write a book. I just used the word "things"). that Shelley has taught me along the way.

A few months ago, Kevin and I had lunch with her.

That morning, I had read through 2 Timothy... The letter that Paul wrote to young Timothy.

Later that night, when we got back to the hotel room, I felt like I was supposed to read through 2 Timothy again.

Can I tell you? As we had sat at lunch with her that day... no bible out on the table, just talking about our lives, our dreams, our families, my fears :)... Shelley ministered to us in a way that lined up so perfectly with the letter that Paul had written to Timothy.

It is so hard to explain... but Kevin and I both walked away feeling encouraged, exhorted, a little admonished :), most of all loved. Probably the way Timothy felt when he read Paul's letter.

One piece of wisdom that she shared with us was that we need to simply follow God. We can't be listening to other people's opinions all of the time. We are responsible to Him and Him alone. She reminded us that on judgement day, when we are standing in front of Him, He isn't going to look at anyone else and ask his/her opinion on how we did.

When it comes to people's opinions... she told us that the people who are criticizing are usually the people who are doing nothing. It's easier to criticize and do nothing than to do something and be criticized.

How true is that???

Shelley has also taught me about the leveraged life.
Not balanced ... leveraged
Everything I am... for Christ.
That sounds crazy in this "must get your life in order and be balanced" world that we live in.

I LOVE IT!

Paul said it to Timothy this way...

For I am already being poured out as a drink offering, and the time of my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 2 Tim. 4:6,7

How I long for my life to be leveraged... all that I am poured out for the sake of Jesus Christ.

One more thing...

As we sat at lunch that day, I began to tell her about some big dreams I had for She Has A Name. In her very sweet way, she looked at Kevin and basically told him to keep me grounded :)... in the moment.

She told me that I need to keep my God given dreams alive, but at the same time... do what needs to be done today with excellence.
Oh how that ministered to my heart. I can be so focused on the big stuff I want God to do "someday" that I forget to live "today" for Him.

There is so much more to say.

However, this is NOT a book... it's a blog :).

This I know for sure... Shelley and Louie are the real deal. God shines brightly in and through both of them.

I am forever grateful for how God has used them to bring us closer to Him.

I know that she hates to be in the spotlight... but God has granted us the privilege of learning from her by having her speak a couple of months ago at Passion City Church.

You can watch the talk here...

http://www.passioncitychurch.com/watch/#20110918

Your faith will be stretched and you will be encouraged for sure.

Happy Birthday Lance!

2011-12-08T00:30:00.000-05:00

Mr. Alanson Joshua David Shock.

Today... we celebrate you!

12 years old.

Some call you Alanson.

Some call you Lance the Pance.

Some call you Mance.

Grandpa Orv calls you Twerp.

One sweet little girl calls you Uncle Mance.

Whatever your name is... today I want you to know that you are so very loved... by so many!

I remember the day you were born.

17 days early.

You insisted on arriving on Grandma Punkie's birthday...

How fun was that?

You were named after your great, great grandfather.

Alanson Huff.

People still can't figure out how to pronounce it...

We just smile and say "Call him Lance".

Your name means "happy one".

Anyone who knows you will agree it is the perfect fit.

Remember when you were 2 yrs. old and I used to call you my little stud muffin?

Then one day you came up to me and said "momma, I an egg."

I replied "egg? you are an egg?"

You quickly said "an egg muffin".

That story still makes me smile!

You have brought so much joy to our lives.

You are a stinkin good athlete.
You are such a servant.
You know how to hang with the big guys, and you are precious with the little kiddos.

Most importantly... You love Jesus and He shines through you!

A true blessing indeed!

Oh... and did you notice?

The green blog colors?

Just for you!

I love you more than words can say!

[If you are reading this and you love Lance too... leave him a msg on here. He isn't quite old enough to have a Facebook page (next year Lance!). So this would be the place to say something :). It is easy to do.... just click on the "comments" below.]

Information Overload

2011-12-07T12:53:00.001-05:00

Technology. Non-Stop. Bombardment.
Which one? What's right? What's going on?
When will the information to my brain stop?
Or at least... slow down?

I don't want to sound old, but man... we are living in some crazy times.

Remember the day when we had one exercise video to choose from?
Jane Fonda?

Today? Take your pick... PX90, Insanity, 30 Day Shred, Yoga, Pilates etc.

Remember when it was meat & potatoes and canned cream corn for supper? Oh, and with a side salad made up of iceberg lettuce, carrots and celery?

Now? I am not even sure what to buy at the store. I just saw an article the other day listing the 10 foods that can kill us -- potatoes, apples and canned tomatoes were on the list! What in the world?

Just when you think you are safe by staying away from the processed foods... now you better beware of the pesticides. Ugh! We can't all move to the farm! [Side note... this post is NOT intended to start an "organic food" debate :)].

How about how to raise the perfect child? Oh, the endless books and information out there now. Enough to make a young mother go crazy!

Back in the "old days" (can you believe I am saying that?)... we had Dr. Spock and Dr. Dobson. That was about it.

In this day and age? Parents are made to feel horrible if their baby does not sleep through the night by the time he/she is 3 months old.

We used to celebrate when it finally DID happen and not worry that we were doing something "wrong" if it didn't.

Here is what I am saying...
We live in crazy times.
Nothing is certain.
Everything keeps changing.

But this I know for sure...
Jesus is still the same. He never changes. The same yesterday, today and forever.

In The Pursuit of God (my very favorite book), A.W. Tozer speaks about how we can't SEE GOD anymore because we are too busy focusing on what is right in front of our eyes. And... oh do we have so much in front of our eyes!

He says we are in desperate need of learning how to flex our spiritual muscles -- learning to SEE GOD, TASTE GOD, HEAR GOD... instead of just being bombarded with the here and now.

We have 18 days left until Christmas.
Instead of immersing myself in the hustle and bustle...
I am planning.
Yes, planning :)... to spend time in my bedroom.
Quiet.
On my knees before God.
Asking Him to reveal Himself to me.
Asking Him to be more REAL to me than all of this other temporary "stuff" that is blurring my view.

I don't think God hates technology. I am pretty sure He actually enjoys seeing His creation discover all the stuff He has made.

I just think He doesn't want technology to overtake us... to rule our hearts and minds... to get in the way of truly SEEING HIM.

Nor does He want us to think that we don't need HIM anymore because we have this life figured out.

Technology.
Food.
Exercise.
All beautiful things.
But,
Without God... absolutely meaningless.

Praying that you and I will SEE HIM more clearly than ever this Christmas season.

A "Light Bulb" Moment

2011-12-02T09:49:00.001-05:00

Have you ever had one of those "light bulb" moments?

One of those "ding, ding, ding - wake up... what have I been thinking?" kind of moments???

When it comes to my relationship with Jesus, that is just what has been happening with me of late.

I am thick headed though, so maybe it just hasn't been a "moment"... takes a little longer for me. I'd say more like a process.

A few months ago I heard a sermon by Louie Giglio about how so many times we see Jesus/God as this intimidating boss in the sky. You know, the one who we go to with our requests hoping he grants us what we are asking for... then we just walk away saying "glad that's over".

This Jesus that we are talking about is the same one who in Revelation 3:20 says...
"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him and he with me."

He wants relationship. He wants to sit down and dine with me. Intimate, caring, loving... spending time with me... that is our God.

SIMPLY AMAZING!

As I listened to the podcast while out on my morning walk, I realized that I have been seeing Him differently than a boss sitting behind a desk or a loving Father who wants to spend time with me.

No... for the last several years, I have been seeing Him as the great professor in the sky.

Let me explain...

I have learned so much theology -- don't get me wrong, theology isn't a bad thing -- we ALL have some sort of theology -- it's what comes to mind when we think about God... and we ALL think about God.

I have read so many books, done bible studies, listened to sermons... again, all good things.

What I am wondering is... how did it get to the point where I am so worried that I just might have the wrong theology?

I have been looking at all of this like I am just a student of God -- He is my professor, sitting at His desk, ready to grade me on my knowledge of Him.

Should women wear head coverings?
Should we sell everything and give all we have to the poor?
Can we drink alcohol?
Did God choose us, or did we have some choice in it?
Can a woman stand and teach in front of men?
Should I (being a woman) speak up in small group?
Is there an age of accountability?
New earth or old earth?
To speak in tongues or not?
Have the gifts ceased?
What authors am I supposed to read?
What podcast should I be listening to?
Who's in? Who's out?
What's right? What's wrong?

You see, if I am going to get graded on all of this, I better get an A!!!
I am scared of that stupid final exam. Scared I might waste my time this semester hanging in the wrong study groups with the wrong kids... the ones who are reading the wrong books.

I want to be right. I want to be smart! Is that so wrong???

Well... I think I need to look at my motives.

Funny, as I am writing this, I realize... this IS my theology... this is the way that I have been viewing God.

Another heavy burden I have put on my own back.

The God of the Universe IS calling us to KNOW HIM -- to "TASTE AND SEE THAT HE IS GOOD", to come in and dine with him.

He is not a just a boss or an old professor just waiting to give me an "F".

He loves me.
He loves you.
He loves us.

He longs for us to know Him.

You see, I long for more than just having a bunch of information "about God". I want to be on my knees asking God to reveal Himself to me... in new and fresh ways.

So... I will keep on reading my bible, listening to podcasts, taking notes from our sermons on Sundays, and participating in our small group.

I am just praying for my focus to change. Change from wanting to know all ABOUT God (so I can be the smart student) to wanting to KNOW JESUS, the one who saved my life and brought me up out of the pit.... rescued me from darkness... to dine with Him for all of eternity.

If this resonates with you at all... take some time to watch this sermon.

http://www.passioncitychurch.com/watch/#20110612

I have to tell you... this has been such a "life changing -- light bulb" process for both me and Kevin... and I pray that God would continue to open our eyes... and yours... to just how AMAZING HE REALLY IS!!

A Lesson Learned…

2011-11-28T17:07:00.001-05:00

Ok… bear with me.
What I am about to post started out as a prayer in my journal.
Somewhere in the midst of the prayer... it turned into a blogpost.
Normally doesn't happen… and I was going to rewrite the whole thing. Then I thought, maybe… just maybe, you all might want a look into the way my ridiculous brain works. :)

Saturday 11/26/11

You are all I need God. You are more than enough!
Sometimes You, in your sovereign plan… no, a lot of times, You bring people into my day, my life, my world, to give me what it is that You know that I need.

But, too many times, I take it upon myself to appoint others, especially my husband, as my Savior… the one that will sweep me off my feet and rescue me out of all my troubles. I lay a burden on the poor guy that he was never meant to bear.

For example, this past Monday [I think this is where it turns into a blog instead of a prayer btw], I was so excited that Kevin was going to be there with me for Andrew's surgery. He couldn't be there for the last one. In fact, most of the time, it's just me… just me with my parents at the dr. office or hospital…just me with our kids. And in spite of all my fears, I do just fine.

Because of my hypochondriac tendencies, I have to be prepared as I walk into these places… I am not even kidding. I take my bible and my iPod. I pray a ton. I don't take any doctor's office lightly. It is a battle in my mind. And… with my parents, I average at least one dr. visit a week.

When I walk into these type of places prepared… I do more than fine. I have even been known to tell others about Jesus in the midst of some very scary circumstances.

Back to the surgery on Monday. Because Kevin was coming with me, I totally let my guard down. Looking back on it, I am not quite sure what I thought having him there was going to do for me, but I do know I was depending on him. Needless to say, the kid let me down.

Is that his fault? Nope! I have to admit, I thought it was... in the moment… I was stinkin mad.

He sat down int he waiting room, put on Drew's headphones and said he was going to "review" the new Coldplay album. And review it he did! He sat there and smiled, and nodded his head to the music… looking kinda cute (I must say) and kinda ridiculous at the same time.

I, on the other hand, sat there getting angry with him and feeling sorry for myself.

Why isn't he paying attention to me?
Does he know we are in a "surgery center"?
Can't he smell it?
Does he care about ME at all????

So of course, we start bickering in Drew's recovery room. Drew finally looked at us and said so very sweetly "Hey guys, I am over here."

How humbling is that?

I was telling my sister-in-law this story last night. That it was a good thing Andrew was so looped up on the drugs… and that I was SURE he didn't remember any of it. Of course right then, Drew piped in with a "I do think I remember that".

Sorry Drew!

It wasn't until later Monday evening that I realized the whole day really had nothing to do with Kevin. I believe now that God was just trying to show me that HE is the one that will satisfy me.

Seems to be a theme in my life lately.

As I run to Him and allow Him to fill me up, the miraculous happens. I have a peace and a joy that can only come from trusting Him.

Then, and only then, am I able to freely give myself away… even in the midst of the scariest situations.

If I would have sat in that waiting room trusting God… just think of how much cuter my husband would have looked to me :)! Maybe I would have even danced along… probably would have been just as embarrassing as the fighting, but a whole lot more fun!

I have to tell you… my husband is a precious, precious man. And, so often is MORE than there for me! God uses him over and over in my life to comfort and love me way beyond what I deserve.

So... in light of this past Monday, I am praying that we all can learn more and more how to fully rely on Jesus…

He is enough.

After Thanksgiving "Thanks"

2011-11-25T18:06:00.001-05:00

Thanksgiving has come and gone.
I have been hesitant to even post anything about it.
It just all seems so cliche.

This year it has been especially crazy.
Dad was in the hospital last week.
Drew had surgery on both feet on Monday.
Kevin came down with cellulitis in his foot on Tuesday.
We think Alayna has strep.
I have changed ice packs and Depends.
I am the resident nurse and pharmacist for the whole household.
I have spent more time in the hospital/dr. office than a recovering hypochondriac can handle.

Not to mention…
Everyone keeps talking about how grateful I should be to have both parents with me on these holidays…
And when I don't feel very grateful, I feel very guilty.

That being said…

When I walked in the door tonight, Mom and Dad were having pumpkin pie by candlelight, listening to the local radio station play Christmas music.

At first I was teary eyed just looking at my parents… it was precious!

Just then, on the radio, came my very LEAST favorite "Christmas" song ever!

You know…

The old...

"and so this is christmas…
blah blah blah…
let's hope it's a good one…
without any tears…
war is over, if you want it….
blah, blah, blah,"

Do you know the one I am talking about?

What in the world? What kind of song is that anyway?

That song in and of itself has the power to send me into a state of depression.

Ok… enough of my "unthankful thanksgiving" rant.

I promise I have a point here.

You see, in the past couple of weeks I have been grappling with the meaning of "sanctification".
What does that word entail?
How is it that we become "sanctified" in our walk with Christ?

Here is what I am learning.

I AM THANKFUL…

Thankful that in ALL of the mess this week….
God loves me tremendously.
He has a purpose in ALL that I am going through…
A much bigger purpose than I can even see.

As I learn to walk closer to Him and lean on Him in all of this, not expecting things (especially holidays) to be picture perfect, He wraps His arms around me and satisfies me even in the darkest night.

I actually looked up the word sanctification… googled it :).
I found out that it means to be "Set apart to God" and "Set apart from the world".

As I go through the crazy hard times, He is making me realize that the world does not satisfy.

Jesus + nothing = everything.
Everything - Jesus = nothing.

I do not need the perfect holiday to feel blessed…
Or the perfect family to feel thankful.

Jesus ALONE is enough.

Am I thankful for all that God has given me?
Of course I am!
Both the good and the bad.

But for real…

When I look to the holidays this season, I don't want to think like that old Christmas song says… "Let's hope it's a good one, without any tears".

Ugh! Where exactly is the "hope" in this song?

Nope… that will NOT be my theme song.

Instead, I want to sing a song of thanksgiving for my Savior's life that was lived, and the cross that He bore, and His body that was resurrected so that I would have a REAL HOPE!!!!

Today…. I live, in all of my circumstances, to KNOW the one who is my hope!

Rom. 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Here is a much better song…
Not Christmas, but much more fitting for where I am this week.

Crazy Thought

2011-11-15T09:44:00.001-05:00

So, I was downstairs exercising this morning, and because I was pretty close to death (need desperately to get into better shape), I had this thought…

What would happen if I keeled over and died right now?

To that I answered…

It would be great. I told God that I would absolutely love to see Him right now... that I totally trust Him with my husband and my children if He wants to take me home right now!

A very sweet peace came over me right then.

I trust God in my dying.

Then I thought…

What is wrong with me that I don't trust Him in my living???? I don't totally trust Him with my husband and my children if He wants to keep me here on this earth today.

Crazy thought huh? It kinda seems like the worry and anxiety that I carry around day to day is based on the premise that I am in some sort of control… as long as I am here to save the day (or ruin it) of course.

For today… I am going to set my heart and mind on 1 Peter 5:6,7

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

He did not choose to take me home while in the midst of my workout.

I am still here, but the God of the Universe is still in control.

Join me in resting and trusting that He cares for our families more than we do…

God, help us by the power of the Holy Spirit to live in that freedom today!

It's Still Hard For Me To Believe

2011-11-08T11:12:00.000-05:00

I know it's been a long time since I have blogged. I have a whole lot of thoughts about blogging, just seems like I don't ever have enough time.

But yesterday while I was out on my walk, I just got to thinking… I am not sure that I've ever really written Kevin and my story out on paper. We've told it countless times…and I'm sure if you are our friend or in our family, you have heard it countless times :)! Today though, I just want to record this story of redemption…and what a better way to do it than here… in blogland?!

So here we go...

If you knew me when I was young, you might say two things about me ~~ I loved Jesus & I loved boys! You can already see where this is going. In high school, I went to all the christian events I possibly could. I really wanted to follow Jesus, but I know my friends would definitely say that I talked more about guys than I ever did about my God.

The summer after our freshman year in college, Mr. Kevin Shock asked me if I wanted to be his "girlfriend". It was kinda official… he even bought me roses. I'm not gonna lie… he was more than CUTE, and I was more than EXCITED! By the end of the summer though, we had broken up. I found out that he cheated on me more than once.

Everything was o.k. though, because I was on my way to B.G.S.U, ready to fulfill my dream of being a twirler with the Falcon's Marching Band.

It was in the middle of those try-outs that I had my first bout of morning sickness -- ugh! I hate even thinking about that moment to this day!

I took a pregnancy test that weekend and my world began to crumble. Kevin didn't say a whole lot at first, but it didn't take long for him to begin his plight to talk me into having an abortion. He let me know several times that I was ruining his life, that he never really loved me, and that this was all just a huge mistake… that I just needed to get rid of.

Tears flowed as I began to cry out to God. You know... the whole "Why me? Everyone else is doing it…why am I the one who gets caught?" Looking back on it, I can now see that it was God's tender love and mercy. He was bringing me back (eventually) to Himself. He was shaping and molding a story that would bring Him much Glory. Funny, how in the midst of all of the hurt and pain, the shame and sickness, I could have NEVER dreamt up what was going to happen.

I knew full well that abortion was not an option. I would go through the first half of my pregnancy fighting with Kevin… and the last half?? Well, we didn't speak at all.

I had the support of family and friends during that time, but still felt so alone and afraid.

Our precious Alyssa was born on April 5, 1990. Oh my goodness, she was beautiful… and the spittin image of her daddy!

Kevin came to visit us in the hospital. I will never forget the tears that ran down his face as he held his daughter for the first time!

He would say that it was in that moment that he knew he would never be the same. Not that he wanted a relationship with God, but that he wanted to be a father to Alyssa.

For the next year and a half, we tried to make things work between us, but we were so different. We fought over everything… how to raise Alyssa, politics, God… the only thing we had in common (that really mattered at that time) was our daughter.

You see… I was trying to get Kevin to be this person that I wanted him to be, so that I could marry him. I knew that the Word of God said we needed to be "equally yoked". I knew I wanted a man who could lead me in our marriage… that I could run hard after Jesus with ~~ I just couldn't get Kevin to fit into that box, and I was perfectly miserable trying!

I finally surrendered to God and called Kevin to break up. I told him that I needed to seek God and His Kingdom first, and that I had been seeking my own kingdom for far too long. My heart ached as I let go, but I knew that the joy and happiness I was longing for could not be found in a guy ~ Oh my… it was hard!

We continued to be friends over the next few months, seeing each other when he would pick up Alyssa on the weekends.

On Christmas night of 1991 something crazy happened. I was out at the Shock's house with Alyssa. Kevin had gone back to his bedroom for awhile. When he came back in to living room, he told me had a present for me. I know I looked stunned and confused, having no idea what he was talking about. He then preceded to tell me that he had just gotten on his knees in his bedroom and surrendered his life to Jesus.

I have to admit, I didn't know what to think… I was happy but cautious at the same time. He couldn't wait to tell my family. My brother and his wife bought him a Bible. He went back to school and just
began to read it... and soak in the love of God.

I remember calling his house (where he lived with 6 guys) one time and his friend asked me what I did with the old Kevin… I explained to him that it was NOT anything I had done… only God could bring someone from death to life… and I was/am so grateful that God chose to save Kevin on that Christmas night!

We were married in March of '93… almost 19 years ago… seems like just yesterday! We now have 4 children, a son-in-law and a beautiful granddaughter.

Please don't think that things have been perfect since then by any means… there have been many consequences from the choices that we made during that time, but God has been gracious to continue to love us and point us to the only thing that brings true joy… HIMSELF!

There was a song that my sister gave me to listen to while I was pregnant with Alyssa… it helped me see so much that this baby that was growing inside of me was not a "mistake" but a beautiful miracle.

I had an amazing teacher that reached out to me as well during that time… he told me that Alyssa was not the "mistake"… having sex outside of marriage was… that was so helpful as well!

Anyway, here is the song… I know it's old school, but the words are absolutely beautiful and so very true!

It Gets Better

2011-05-19T15:00:00.001-04:00

Have you seen the new commercial out there that has the celebrities saying to kids who are being bullied "It gets better"? If you haven't seen it yet, I am sure that you will soon.

I understand and feel deeply for these kids. I hate that this happens... it breaks my heart.

Because of this campaign, I have had a few thoughts that I would like to share...

I want to extend hope to so many people I know today who experience suffering.

In light of the Gospel Of Jesus Christ... IT GETS BETTER.

For the pastors in China who are imprisoned right now for their faith...

IT GETS BETTER.

For the Christians in Africa who are being tortured for their belief...

IT GETS BETTER.

For the young believing families in India who have lost everything....

IT GETS BETTER.

For the missionaries all over the world who are giving up their lives for what they believe...

IT GETS BETTER.

For the high school kids who are ridiculed daily and mocked because of their belief in Christ...

IT GETS BETTER.

AND THE LIST GOES ON...

The Apostle Paul knew this very well. As he wrote his last letter (2 Timothy), he was under no illusion that he was going to get out of that prison cell alive... and yet he had an unshakable HOPE that it was going to GET BETTER!

2 Tim. 1: 12 That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.

Paul was believing and dreaming for that day... that is where all of his HOPE was!

I love to think of Heb. 12:1 in light of all of this...

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Think about it... we have a great cloud of witnesses cheering us on... I imagine Paul, Stephen, John, Mary, Peter, etc... saying to us "IT GETS BETTER". They know. They get it now. They understand that this life is only a vapor. They understand that we have an unshakable HOPE in the author and perfecter of our faith Jesus Christ!!!

Let us fully believe the words of Jesus when he said:

John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

How comforting to know that we have a Savior who suffered himself, that we may have eternal life with HIM.

May we take heart today knowing full well that IT GETS BETTER.

Here's What I Do Know...

2011-05-17T16:14:00.004-04:00

Life is crazy around here.
Dad seems to be getting worse...
He is still so cute though.
Mom gets very frustrated with him...
She still loves that man so much.
It is raining.
I have to pick up Dad's van from our mechanic.
I haven't even thought about supper.
We have a co-ed bridal shower for 3 couples tonight at community group.
I am bringing the meatballs...
and cupcakes (courtesy of Kristen, Christen & Alayna).
I so love our community group.
Katie might come :).
We have so much to do for She Has A Name.
I cleaned our bathrooms this morning!
Alayna is trying to finish up Math for the year today.
I adore my husband!
God is on His throne.
We are taking our first ever alone family vacation on Friday.
Atlanta here we come!
The very God who placed the stars in the sky and knows them by name...
He cares about me...
and what is going on in my house and my heart right now.
When I thirst, I need to turn to HIM...
All my fountains are in HIM!
He is the well that never will run dry.
I often run to broken cisterns that don't hold water...
and lick the dirt off of the bottom.
BUT.... I am learning more and more to...
RUN to HIM.
TRUST in HIM.
HOPE in HIM.
REST in HIM.

Jesus is my everything.
That's all I know.

A Sweet Mother's Day

2011-05-08T21:12:00.020-04:00

We just sat at Bob Evans with my mom and dad, Kevin's parents, our kids, our grandbaby and our niece Katie. Hard to believe we had 4 generations (on both sides of our family) enjoying everything from pancakes... to fish... to a big ol' burger. Bob Evans is a great place for such an age span :)!

I realized as I was sitting there just how special this moment really was. I so wanted to savor every minute of it. Crazy how fleeting time is.

We just sent Alyssa and Kessa off... back to their new home in Indy.
Right before they took off we captured Kessa on video...
singing her precious rendition of The ABC Song for her mom, grandma and 2 great grandmas.
We were all so very proud :)!

Go Ahead... Stand On A Chair!

2011-05-06T16:58:00.002-04:00

Alyssa and Kessa are here.
She (Alyssa that is) just sat down at the piano...
Playing Grace Flows Down.
It was beautiful.
Asked her if she would play my favorite...
Help Me To Find You by Todd Fields.
A song that we learned at Passion '05.
We sang it in our leader's group.
Had never heard it before.
I think it is one of my all time favorites.
When Lys plays it, I stand up on a chair...
I am not even kidding (there are people who have witnessed this...).
And sing it at the top of my lungs...
It ain't pretty.
But I don't rightly care.
The kids don't even laugh at me...
They know I mean business.
After singing today, I found it on youtube.
Just want to share it with you!
Feel free to stand on a chair and sing once you catch on :)!!!

One Life Can Impact So Many

2011-05-03T16:01:00.003-04:00

Some might say my mom has a "simple faith". Actually, that is what she calls it. I would say her faith and trust in our God truly are the furthest thing from simple ~ She has a deep, beautiful, trust in a very personal Savior. I can tell you this... she hasn't ever read Systematic Theology or studied The Doctrines of Grace, but if you have had an encounter with my mom, you have had an encounter with Jesus.

I am the baby of 5 children... not an accident, a pleasant surprise :)! The span between me and my oldest brother is 18 years. He was going into the Air Force when I was born. Needless to say, when I came into the world, my mom was already a very busy lady. With kids in high school, jr. high, elementary school, and a full time job, she definitely had her hands full. I have to tell you though, she was never stretched too thin to have time for me.

She was a rocker. Not like "hard rock music" rocker... but "sit in a rocking chair and rock me until I fell asleep" rocker. It was in that black wooden rocking chair that I learned so many of our great old hymns. Some of Mom's favorite ones to sing to me were "How Great Thou Art", "Amazing Grace", and "Old Rugged Cross". I knew them all so well... and then passed them along to our 4 children as we wore out our Lazy Boy Rocker.

On the first day of Kindergarden I asked Mom to take care of Freddy (my ultimate favorite Teddy Bear... he still lives today ~ in spite of the torture that my big brother used to put him through).
Mom said she would be glad to take care of him. Come to find out, that lady not only watched out for my little Freddy, she rocked that Teddy to sleep... she still talks about it! That's why we love Punkie!

Through all of my growing up years, one thing was certain, my mom had the gift of serving and hospitality. Our house was always open ~ and people were always stopping by. She never made a small amount of food for supper. A big pot of chili or vegetable soup was frequently on the stove. I'm pretty sure our friends could smell it from afar, because our house was NEVER empty.

And... if you were a guest at our house, you received the royal treatment for sure. She loved and still loves to serve anyone who comes her way.

Prov. 31 states that a Godly Woman is one that is up before dawn and does not let her lamp go out at night. Yep... that's Punkie ~ We are still baffled as to how she can go on 4 hours of sleep and have such a happy heart!

Mom lost her mother in a car accident when she was 13. I can't imagine. She has so many neat memories of her mom, and yet has never really felt sorry for herself about her mom's death. She truly is a woman that believes that her God is in control and trustworthy.

Over the years, our family has had our ups and downs, but I can honestly say that my mom has been a rock ~ or should I say, has been standing on a rock ~ trusting in her Savior Jesus Christ.

Today, she and my dad live with us. Dad is 84 and difficult to take care of. Mom is a trooper though... it's midnight right now and I can hear her downstairs playing cards with our niece -- Energizer Bunny, I tell ya!

How in the world can I possibly say "Thanks" to my mom for all she has done over the years?

For you Mom,
I just want to let you know how very thankful I am for the absolute unconditional love that you have had for me (and our whole family) over the years. You have taught us all what it means to trust God and live for others. Along with the flowers we will plant in our backyard, I wanted to do something extra special to honor you this Mother's Day.
Because I know how much you care about the things that God cares about, I have made a donation to As Our Own in your honor. This monetary donation will go to help precious little 3 and 4 yr. old girls be rescued from a life of slavery in the brothels of India! They will be cared for with as much love as you have had for all of your children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, etc. They will be well fed, given an education, and most importantly, pointed toward Jesus Christ.
It just seems fitting to give this donation in honor of the woman who has given so selflessly over the years.
Happy Mother's Day Mom...
I love you dearly!

Kevin and I are so very thankful that we were introduced to this way of honoring our moms this Mother's Day.

Here is an excerpt from Amanda Jones' blog, the person who first came up with this brilliant idea...

Rescuing children from horrific exploitation and eventual death from AIDS does not come without a cost. For those of you reading this, the cost is financial. For a team of believers on the ground in India, the cost is spiritual and physical. It takes roughly $184 per month for As Our Own to care for one precious little girl. Today I am looking for people who will partner with us by giving sacrificially to As Our Own. Let's equip them to do the work God has called them to do. They are anointed for this work. They are even training pastors to take up this cause so that the church in India will become a mighty advocate for these children. The momentum is building and I ask you to please be a part of what God is doing.

Honestly, it is easier not to know about these things. I could have written details in this post that would have made you sick for the rest of the week. What happens in that red-light district haunts me daily. But I will not turn away because it's easier. I will consider what is happening, how I can help, and I will take five minutes to go to As Our Own's new web site and actually do it. The beauty is that right now you and I can impact a child's future and honor our moms (or a special mother figure in our lives) at the same time. Who is with me?

Here’s a special way to say, “Thanks, Mom!”
STEP 1 :: Give to our Thanks, Mom! campaign to honor your mom on Mother’s Day, May 8.
STEP 2 :: In the donation comments box, tell us what you appreciate most about your mom.
STEP 3 :: Download a certificate for your mom that explains the gift you’ve made in her name.
About As Our Own
The extreme poverty in India places girls at great risk for exploitation, enslavement, and neglect. Girls are regularly abused and degraded, forced into lives of bonded labor, either in organized begging or the sex trade.
These girls will face a dark, horrific future—unless someone intervenes.
God has opened the door for As Our Own to rescue girls before they are exploited, giving us the privilege to care for each one as our own—for life. We are building strong communities through our Lighthouse church network and training strong leaders and pastors at our Hope College, all to break these cycles for girls in future generations.
Your gifts make a lasting difference for these girls. Thank you!

My Prayer For Today

2011-04-21T09:04:00.001-04:00

This video is really speaking to my heart right now.
A sweet new friend pointed me to this song.
It's not easy when you are in a position of leadership...
OF ANY KIND...
Whether it's ministry, family, or just plain blogging.

I just hate it when my ego gets in the way...
When I long for the approval of man.
Makes me seriously want to just give up...
Hand in the towel (is that how you say it?).

In this video, Lecrae is has done an amazing job showing us how to pray.

For today Lord... YOU LEAD! I can play the background...
Let me rest in YOU and play the supporting in role in your unfolding story!

To Honor Our Moms!

2011-04-18T23:57:00.000-04:00

Mother's Day is right around the corner.
I know, Easter first right?
BUT... Easter is coming late this year, which means
we can all take a minute right now to plan ahead on just how
we can make Mom's Day extra special this year!

I love my mom... shout out to Punkie :)! She is so precious!
I plan on writing a blog in her honor on the actual day --
there are so many great stories (beautiful and funny) to tell
about that woman...
OK... wasn't going to do this now, but here is just one...

When I was a senior in high school some of the guys in our
class decided it would be funny to T.P. our house...
I won't name names... or maybe I will (my hubby, Geoff, Scott, Jon, Rob etc.)
Anyway, as they were in the process, Mom came out of the house and instead
of yelling at them, she invited every single one of the villains in for some
HOT CHOCOLATE! Who does that???? Oh yeah, Punkie does :)!!!

For now though, I have come across an AMAZING opportunity for all
of us to honor our Moms.

Let me back up for a minute...
Most of you know that Kevin and I have been involved with a ministry (She Has A Name) that longs to shed light on the darkness of human trafficking, both here and around the world.

The longer we have been a part of this, the more we learn ~
The more we learn, the darker this whole subject becomes.
The reality is TRAGIC!

As I was reading a book on this subject one night, I was
completely overwhelmed! Kevin so gently reminded me of this
verse:
Rom. 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Awesome verse... much needed truth. Thanks Kev!

Ok... So what does this all have to do with our Moms???

I am about to tell you :)

There is a ministry that we have learned about and are partnering with through
She Has A Name that is really living out Rom. 12:21 ~ overcoming evil with good!

As Our Own is a beautiful example of this. They are rescuing young girls (as young as
4 yrs. old) out of the brothels in India, and raising these sweet things (as their own) tobecome amazing young women of God!

These little girls are rescued out with the permission of their own mothers (who are enslavedin prostitution). How loving and courageous it is for these moms to let their little ones go in the hopes that their daughters will have a chance at life outside of these horrendous conditions!

So...
Here's the deal...

As Our Own is giving us an opportunity to honor our own moms and also be a part of overcoming evil with good by helping these moms and daughters clear across the Globe!

What an incredible way to give a gift that isn't just temporary...
It will have eternal consequences!

Join with me in following these simple 3 steps...

Here’s a special way to say, “Thanks, Mom!”
STEP 1 :: Give to our Thanks, Mom! campaign to honor your mom on Mother’s Day, May 8.

STEP 2 :: In the donation comments box, tell us what you appreciate most about your mom.

STEP 3 :: Download a certificate for your mom that explains the gift you’ve made in her name.

A note from and about As Our Own

The extreme poverty in India places girls at great risk for exploitation, enslavement, and neglect. Girls are regularly abused and degraded, forced into lives of bonded labor, either in organized begging or the sex trade.

These girls will face a dark, horrific future—unless someone intervenes.

God has opened the door for As Our Own to rescue girls before they are exploited, giving us the privilege to care for each one as our own—for life. We are building strong communities through our Lighthouse church network and training strong leaders and pastors at our Hope College, all to break these cycles for girls in future generations.

Your gifts make a lasting difference for these girls. Thank you!

So... there you have it!
Let's do this together.
Along with those 3 steps...
Leave a comment here on my blog...
Let us know you are in... and also give a little shout out to your mom :)!

How It All Got Started...

2011-02-02T20:21:00.006-05:00

It's been a long process... wrapped in a whole lot of prayer, asking God how we can be a part of what He is doing among the poor and marginalized... in our city and throughout the world.

It started with praying over Isaiah 58:9-11 and believing His Word is TRUE...

9 Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer; you shall cry, and he will say, 'Here I am.' If you take away the yoke from your midst, the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
10 if you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday.
11 And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.

At the same time, we were introduced to the fact that slavery still abounds, not only in foreign countries, but even right here in Columbus Ohio.

Then came the question... What do we all do with this information???

We found out there ARE ways to be part of the solution.

We began by attending a sex-trafficking training seminar....
It was there that She Has A Name first came to our minds.
We learned that when we are out doing street ministry we are supposed to find out the girl's name first. In the few minutes that we have to speak with her, we are to say her name as much as possible... AND REMEMBER IT... in case we see her the next time we are out.

The reason behind this is simply that her pimp will often tell the "john" (male paying for sex) that "She doesn't have a name. She is whatever you want her to be." I know... the whole thing is tragic!
Yet another vivid depiction of a world that would seek to dehumanize a person for financial gain!
At about the same time, we heard a beautiful new song by Donna Stuart that had just come out:

PART OF THE SOLUTION

She has a name, she is somebody’s daughter
she was made in the image of our King
But she’s a slave held captive in chains
In Jesus Name, we have got to do something

LORD devastate- our hearts for the sins in- our own lives
Then shine Your light- through us as You reach out

We want to touch eternity
We want to be Your hands Your feet
Jesus give us eyes to see
Make us part of the solution
To fight in hope with love for peace
Jesus use us as You please
Only You can set them free
But make us part of the solution

We cry out Lord have mercy
Send us out to the poor and hurting
Break walls down so Your Spirit can rush in

http://donnastuartmusic.com/?page_id=25 (in case you want to hear/buy the song!)

The information we had received... and this song drove us to our knees to pray all the more!

As we began to tell our friends about the street outreach ministry we were doing, they all said the same type of things:

"We had no idea it's going on right here in Columbus."
"We might not want to get in a van at 10pm and drive into the most dangerous neighborhoods in the city, but we sure do want to do something!"
"How can we help??"

We are realizing that this just isn't a "government" issue. We believe that our government can help in the fight to end this type of slavery...
It is time for the people of God to not only join in the fight, but to LEAD THE CHARGE! We can no longer simply close our eyes or turn our backs on this issue.

You see, we believe that we can be a "part of the solution" to not only end this tragic oppression, but most importantly of all... Offer these women and children the only "TRUE FREEDOM".... which is JESUS CHRIST.

Thus... the T-SHIRTS :)!

A simple way to raise awareness about what is going on here in Columbus and abroad... and raise support for the organizations who are in the fight to end human trafficking along with us.

Here is the link for you to order the shirts...
www.shehasaname.com

Join us in the fight!

Celebrating Today

2010-12-18T09:23:00.002-05:00

17 years ago today, I sat in a cold dark hospital room recovering from an emergency c-section just a few hours prior... and wondering if our precious little Andrew was going to live or die. He had been sent off to Toledo Hospital (an hour away) after delivery. Dr. Matthew came in and gave us the news that our newborn son either had a broken blood vessel or an aneurysm on his brain.

My memories of that hospital stay are awful at best. Let me first say, that I was not walking close to God at that time. I that point, I was simply praying to Him that He would save my son... I knew nothing of the Peace that He had to offer.

I felt so alone. Kev was in Toledo with Drew (where I wanted him to be), and I was in pain! The hospital was short staffed, so I remember having my breakfast, lunch and dinner trays all piled up in the corner of the room. I just stared at Katie Couric on The Today Show. Relief was nowhere to be found.

By the way... c-sections are really painful!

It ended up after many tests, the doctors concluded that Drew was fine. They believe the apnea he experienced was from the anesthetic they used to knock me out.

Fast forward to one year later~

That is when the anxiety/depression/hypochondria set in. I can look back now and see a big correlation between the two. I believe that it took another Christmas to come around for me to realize it could all happen again.

Nevertheless... the anxiety had come!

Now Fast forward 16 years~

Thursday night I was sitting in our "Breaking Free" bible study, talking about my struggles.

My sweet mother-in-law --- note to self (and to you) -- it ain't easy being in a bible study like "Breaking Free" with your mother-in-law... God really has a sense of humor!

OK... my sweet mother-in-law looked at me and asked "Everyday Karen? You struggle everyday? Do you think you are just a selfish person?"

YES! The answer is YES!!! I know I am a very selfish person... and YES! I struggle everyday!

But here is the deal -- I am thankful for that ugly hospital stay 17 years ago. I am thankful for the anxiety that set in 16 years ago. Satan may mean it for evil, and I may absolutely hate it, but God has used my weakness to draw me to Himself.

I do struggle everyday, but that struggle brings me to my knees (literally), and sends me to my bible.

As I sat in Dr. McClure's office a few weeks ago (he is an amazing man of God), telling him of my newest fears, he looked right at me and said "You know, you are one of the most Godly women I have ever met." I laughed "You have got to be kidding me! I am telling you all my fears, and this is the response I get?"

But again... here is the deal ---

Because of my weakness, I do talk a whole lot about my Savior. I do know a whole lot of verses in the bible. I do spend a whole of time crying out to Him on my knees. Most importantly, I do get really excited about the fact that the God of the Universe loves me and sent his son to die for my sin... and draws near to me... and brings me peace when I call to Him!

That is why I sing loudly ~ that is why I tell people ~ that is why I want the NATIONS to hear the Good News.

He has saved me!

Am I perfect? Nope! Do I still struggle? Yep... everyday!

However, I will rest in His Word...

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Cor. 12:9

So... yesterday we celebrated our precious (ok, cool) Andrew's 17th birthday.

Today, I celebrate that dark hospital stay that began a life of knowing my Savior more intimately than I could ever have imagined!

Thanks be to God...

Here is a song to celebrate http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyYWWKJt-Hs

If you like the song... here is an amazing talk to go along with it http://www.passioncitychurch.com/watch/#20100725

Homesick

2010-12-14T15:17:00.001-05:00

Ahhh... Quincy (my precious nephew that I babysit) is napping, kids have finished school, dishwasher is running... I have a free minute!

I'm thinking that since I have stumbled upon Ann's blog aholyexperience.com, I have somehow been intimidated by her beautiful writing and my brain has been in a fog when it comes to blogging. Realizing just how completely ridiculous (and sinful!) it is to even compare myself with her... I am back... just being who God has made me to be :).

Things are going well with my parents. I will have to post some pictures when I get another minute... their bedroom is just a little slice of 1123 Schultz St... it's perfect for them.

I have to tell you though, that my Dad keeps saying he wants to "go home".... When we start to respond, he says "I know, you are going to tell me I live here now, but I still want to go home". It is really hard for me to hear that and not take it personally... and to know that it isn't going to get any better for him... at least as far as his memory goes.

I want to add in here that my Dad is really having a blast with our kids. He and Lance play ball in the living room all the time. He still LOVES to laugh at everything, sing silly songs, and tease Bailey and Zoe. He just longs to "go home" sometimes.

This morning I was praying about it when these questions came to me... Is it really so bad to want to go home? And... Where exactly is home?

I know Dad is talking about "Defiance", but I also know that I can somehow relate.

I am not home yet.

Philippians 1:23-24 I am hard presssed between the two. My desired is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better for me. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.

Funny how sometimes I just forget that I am not home yet. I get way too comfortable here... I don't long to be at home with Christ.

I decided this morning that when Dad talks about going home, I am going to point him to JESUS! I am going to remind him of where is REAL HOME IS. I will also remind him that, along with me, he ISN'T home yet... but, together, we can look forward to the day when Our Savior will indeed call us home.

Until then, I am reminded by the Apostle Paul in verse 22 -- If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me.

Until then, there is much work to be done, many prayers to be prayed, songs to be sung, people to be reached... and the list could go on and on... Quincy just woke up :)

May our days be filled with the knowledge that "we aren't home yet"....

Goodbye 1123 Schultz Street

2010-08-01T22:32:00.000-04:00

We leave for Defiance on Wednesday.
It doesn't even seem real yet.
Going to pack up Mom and Dad and bring them back here to live with us.
This house will be ready for them... we have moved our bedrooms all around to prepare.
I am ready to have them here... Kevin is ready... the kids are ready...
I think Mom and Dad are ready :)

But, am I ready to say goodbye to 1123 Schultz St???
So many priceless memories...
card games in the kitchen,
jumping on our trampoline,
practicing the baton on the sidewalk,
Punkie's chili for ANYONE who happened to stop by,
and the list goes on....

So... if you are around D-Town this week, stop by and say "Hi"!
Mom and Dad would love it...
We kids will be working hard and laughing hard, as we
revisit precious memories in our little brick home.
Did we really ALL live in a 3 bedroom/1 bath house???

A Sweet Day

2010-07-19T12:23:00.002-04:00

Lance was baptized yesterday
There were no cameras
No video
No dry clothes to put on after
Just a sweet 10 year old boy
Who knew it was time
And with tears in his eyes
Tugged on my sleeve and said
"I wanna do this."

God Provides Opportunities!

2010-03-26T11:13:00.002-04:00

I know it has been awhile since I have posted on this blog, but I have had a pretty tough winter when it comes to my anxiety and depression. One thing that has struck me through it all, is that when I look to God and really care about others... my anxiety diminishes.

I'm so thankful for the AMAZING sermons I have heard from Louie Giglio http://www.passioncitychurch.com/watch/#20100131 and Ben Stuart http://breakawayministries.org/resources that spoke right to my anxiety.

God has also brought some dear friends into my life that come directly from me being open an honest about my struggles. I have found out that there are so many others fighting the same thing! It is a real joy for me to share the HOPE of Christ with them even in the midst of my weakness!

We rented The Blindside on Tues... such a powerful movie! One thing I realized while watching it was that the mom was not down at the homeless shelter looking for someone to invite to live with them. God simply placed an opportunity in front of her... and she was available and willing to take a chance... BEAUTIFUL!!!!

Three years ago we had the same thing happen. God placed some homeless people in our lives and although we were scared... we took a chance. Now, I have to say... none of them became pro football players, but our lives will NEVER be the same.

Because of the movie, I began praying that God would provide another opportunity for us to serve Him in that way... and it didn't take long for Him to answer! Amy got a call yesterday morning from an OSU Medical social worker. Somehow Amy's name was down as a contact for one of the homeless men that used to live with us. He had been hit by a car and broke his leg. They put him in ICU yesterday morning because of the meds he is for the alcohol withdrawal. We went to see him last night. He only weighs 110 lb.... is heavily sedated right now... looks pretty awful. We sang his favorite hymn to him (Old Rugged Cross). We talked to the Dr. and nurse that are caring for him and gave them all the info. we knew. He literally has no one but us!

We will go back down to see him tomorrow... he should be waking up by then. Amy and Billy have some extra room at their house, so they will probably ask him to recover there. We are praying that God will save Keith... believing that He has placed Keith in our lives for that very reason!

Please pray with us!

Keith is the one on the far right... with the coffee in his hand.

2 Milestones in 10 Days

2009-12-06T23:29:00.004-05:00

There have been significant milestones over the last several years in my "recovery" from fear...

This past couple of weeks there have been two of them!

First of all, a family member called me out the other night as we were in a discussion about where this country is heading. I said that I wasn't afraid... she said something like "You??? You??? You're the most fearful person I know". Man, was that a huge wake up call! I have thought long and hard on that one... it rings in my ears! Being called out is never fun, but God is using it to open my eyes. Is that what I want to be known for?

The second... and most important... is just being able to see and hear one of our favorite pastors, Matt Chandler, go through an enormous trial (one that I have always been afraid of) with such a faith in God. The kind of faith that he has preached about for years. His sermons have always helped me and pointed me to the truth that CHRIST IS EVERYTHING!!!

Matt had a seizure on Thanksgiving morning because of a brain tumor. He had it removed this past Friday. He and his wife Lauren have absolutely been shining a huge spotlight on our GREAT and SOVEREIGN GOD throughout this whole trial!

Watch this video that they made a couple of days prior to the surgery... what a testimony! I am thanking God for the Chandlers tonight... still praying for them... that God would continue to be their strength and their hope!

http://hv.thevillagechurch.net/blog/hvpastor/?p=363

My 40th Birthday Cake!

2009-12-04T15:23:00.005-05:00

Just wanted to show off the cake that my niece Christen and Daughter Alayna made me for my 40th.

All of my favorites in one cake....

Favorite word.... HOPE!
Comes from life verse...
Rom. 15:13 May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in HIM, so that you may overflow with HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Favorite drink...
PEPSI OF COURSE! Btw, don't tell Aunt Ruthie :)

And then these girls went above and beyond by writing all of my favorite verses on the cake!

Not only was the cake beautiful... it tasted AMMMAZING!!!!

Check out their website... www.thecutiepiebakery.com

His Grace is ENOUGH for me!

2009-11-20T09:18:00.000-05:00

I am sitting here this morning thinking and praying about how to say all I want to say right now. I feel like I might have had a breakthrough with my fears this morning. I have had more than a few "lightbulb moments" in my struggle with anxiety.

This revalation was brought on by my hearing about Stephanie Spielman's death last night. As soon as I heard it, my stomach was in knots. I wish I could say that it is because I felt bad for her family and friends, but if I am being honest... I was thinking about me. I KNOW!!! How absolutely RIDICULOUS!!!

When things like this happen, I immediately try to imagine myself and my family going through it... and I get scared...it's so selfish... it's what any good hypochondriac would do... bring the focus back to me!

One thing that I was taught long ago in my battle with hypochondria was that God will not give me the grace for my imagination. The people who are actually going through the trial... those are the ones He gives the grace to... not to me just trying to imagine what it might be like.

This morning as I was praying about it, I realized that God does not give me the grace for my imagination, but he DOES give me the grace that I need to fight in the battle of my thoughts! He DOES give me the grace that I need to get through the day without cancer, loving Him, serving others, praying for the unreached peoples of the world!

I just realized that instead of longing for the grace that He gives others in their times of need, I need to realize that HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR ME TODAY....

I have had Chris Tomlin's song Your Grace Is Enough in my head all morning.... LOVE IT!!!

Thanking God that His GRACE is working in the Spielman's house today... and in the Shock house!

The Shadow of the Cross

2009-10-01T08:36:00.001-04:00

I am loving the new David Crowder Band CD -- Church Music. The words to the songs just hit home, and it is the BEST MUSIC EVER to run to!

My favorite song so far on the cd is Shadows. The lyrics are incredible...

When shadows fall on us

We will not fear

We will remember

When darkness falls on us

We will not fear

We will remember
When all seems lost

When we're thrown and we're tossed

We remember the cost

We rest in Him

Shadow of the cross

What a word picture! When I listen to the song,

I can feel myself kneeling in the shadow...

Resting there...

Peaceful there...

Safe there...

No worries there...

HOPE there!

It reminds me of a sermon I heard by Matt Chandler ( I wish I could remember which one it was).

He said (and I am paraphrasing)...

The cross is not something we lean against and tell others they had better come over here and kneel down...

No, the cross is place where I myself am kneeling and telling others there is room here for them as well!

Don't Kick the Football!

2009-09-26T16:33:00.002-04:00

Here it is...

I am Charlie Brown --
Satan is Lucy --
I keep falling for the same old lies!

Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly
.
Everytime I watched this cartoon as a kid, I always just wanted to scream at him "Stupid Charlie Brown! Why are you falling for it ONCE AGAIN?????"
Is that not what we do all the time? same old lie, maybe packaged a little differenly
.
My friend Jane pointed this word picture out to me last week. I keep thinking about it, and it has helped me sooo much! I am putting this picture up all over my house...
I will NOT kick the football!

watch video here:
http://www.hgtv.com/videos/the-elusive-football/8751.html

One Last Tribute... Kathy Kaye!!!

2009-09-13T14:26:00.002-04:00

My only sister!

She thinks I will have nothing to say about her... believe me, I have plenty!

Kath is 13 years older than I am, and I am pretty sure I have been following along in her footsteps my whole life. From being a majorette, to homeschooling, to reformed theology... the way that she has lived has so much shaped who I am!

Of all of the women I have talked about so far, I have to say... she is my favorite! Can I say that :)???

All of the others have come in and out of my life due geographics and circumstances beyond our control... but Kath... she has been the one "constant" in my life. She has always been there... no matter how far apart we live!

One of her gifts is that she is such a good listener... and we all know that is a must if you are in my life :)... she will listen, and listen, and listen some more... and then have such encouraging words to say at that end, always pointing me back to Christ!

I can remember being on a walk with her before God saved Kevin. I didn't have the faith at that time that Kevin could be saved. She said to me "Kevin is more than likely chosen by God, because he is being exposed to the truth all over the place." Kathy had faith in a big huge God that was in the business of saving sinners... enough faith for me and her both!

Her words so impacted my life when I was struggling with all my fears of illness. I just thought that I was a walking hypochondriac, and that is how everyone else saw me. She gently reminded me that my fears did not define me! I was and still am defined by the fact that Christ lives in me... I am a beloved, holy, chosen one of God!

One phrase that Kath uses over and over... I think she learned it from one of her mentors... is "Don't doubt in the dark what God has shown you in the light". Again, I have to be reminded of that so often! We believe God has clearly shown us the way in some area of our lives, and then as soon as it gets hard or difficult, we doubt.

I not only pray that I can be a person who doesn't doubt, but that I can point others to the truth that without faith it is impossible to please God. I know my sister pleases God with her faith in Him.

I have to mention that she is also an absolute BLAST to be around! Her kids will even attest to that! We have had more fun times together over the years... she has a "killer" sense of humor :)! She is also not a bad songwriter or author. God has given her some kind of imagination and it is fun to see it play out in her and her family's lives :)!

I am thankful that 40 years ago, Kathy prayed for a baby sister (she even wore pink pajamas the whole time mom was pregnant). And will be forever grateful for her continuing to pray for me the last 40 years...

I love you Kath!

A Tribute... Cindy Kaelber

2009-09-12T17:44:00.004-04:00

Ok... I know the Big Game is only a few hours away, but I want to tell you about my dear precious friend Cindy... and then I promise I will put my "game face" on!

I was just thinking about her a little bit ago, and how she said to us one day "I'm tired, and I could go take a nap, but I think I'm gonna go for a bike ride instead. After all, energy breeds energy ya know!" I LOVE THAT!!! I want to LIVE that out in my life...

She is the older woman that I had been praying for since we moved to Columbus. I just kept praying that an older, wiser woman would step into my life... and God answered so hugely with Cindy!

Last fall, I met her when we worked together out at Leed's Farm. I could see instantly that she has such a peace about her, and I admire that so much.

At that time we were in the heat of wedding planning, and I was stressed to the max. Cindy would just keep reminding me to ENJOY the time... it would go by fast. She was so right!

I was busy trying to micro-manage (imagine that!) every detail of the wedding, and I could get pretty upset with the bride and groom if they didn't see it my way. Cindy had been through 4 weddings with her children, and would just tell me to step back and let them make their own mistakes... oh, and she would say it with a sweet little smile on her face :)! Man, was that hard! But, as I began to relax and let them make decisions, God brought a peace into my heart that I can't explain. I will never forget that advice... I want to keep living that out as the years go on. I know it makes for a happier extended family!

I LOVE meeting at Panera early in the morning with Cindy... I LOVE hearing about her grown children who are all walking with the Lord... I LOVE praying with her... I LOVE her hugs... I LOVE her passion for Christ...

I am looking forward to working with her the next several weekends at Leed's... I will pass along anymore wisdom that she has to give as the time goes on!

Oh, and did I tell you... she makes the most delicious Chocolate Cream Pies :)!

A Tribute... Lori Miller

2009-09-11T11:05:00.002-04:00

Momma Lori! What can I say about Momma Lori?

Better known at Blackhawk as "Korban's mom"... and at first that is exactly how I knew her... but when she and David started coming to our small group, all of that quickly changed! It was so nice to have some gray hair in the midst of all of us "20 & 30 somethings"!

She became not only my mentor, but my biggest cheerleader... she so has the gift of encouragement!!!

Kevin and I would go to the Miller's house and sit on the couch and eat some of David's famous popcorn... and just listen to them... ok, maybe I talked a little ;).... they had so much wisdom to pour into us about child rearing, ministry, relationships etc.!

I got to see up close and personal just how Lori could befriend someone at work and bring her into the family of Christ~with Jane Treece. Jane is an amazing testimony of how Lori could love someone and lead her into a vibrant walk with the Lord!

My favorite trait of Lori's is how she could "lovingly" give me a verbal spanking when I would go to her with a problem... and I would literally walk away thinking how awesome that was, and how much I love her!

I remember one time... Kev and I were at the Miller's house and I was telling them how I was worried about a medical test I was going to have later that week. She got all up in my face and told me I had to "shelf it"... meaning put the thought up on the shelf and not think about it until I actually have the test done.... after all, what good is it going to do me to worry? It worked! Kevin still uses that one on me to this day!!! I might be mad at him at the time, but I know it is truth! Matthew 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

I love my Momma Lori... I miss her a whole lot! We still talk on the phone, and she still cheers me on to living victoriously In Him!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A pause...

2009-09-10T09:34:00.004-04:00

I am half way through "My Tributes"... and I have to pause and say something.

This morning as I was out walking/praying/trying to run, I had a sort of revelation.

I'm just gonna be honest here. I realized how much I am wondering if the three ladies I wrote about have seen what I wrote... wondering if they liked it, if I offended anyone, if I did not do them enough justice (sidenote, they all 3 know me well enough to know that I would be thinking that :)!).

In the midst of all that thinking, Chris Tomlin's "All The Way My Savior Leads Me" came on my ipod. As I was listening, I felt like God was saying to me (not audible btw!) "Ya big geek (ok, maybe He didn't say that, but it sure did sound like it), Why are you so worried about what others think? I am right here.... THANK ME for those women in your life. Who do you think put them there? Who knew EXACTLY what you needed and when you needed it? Who gave these women the words that they needed to say to you at just the right time? ME, ME, ME... Give ME the Glory! And the cool thing is, I am not going anywhere! I will continue to stay right here... and I will continue to place people in your life to help lead and guide you closer to ME!"

So today I pause... and say THANK YOU GOD for all you have done and will continue to do!

Another Tribute... Laurie Doden

2009-09-09T16:52:00.000-04:00

I am so excited to write about Laurie D.! If I had to use one sentence to describe her it would be "She walks with God"!

The first time I met her was in a youth leaders meeting at Blackhawk. we were told to write notes of encouragement to each other. Laurie wrote one to Kev and me (I still have it)... she signed her note "Desiring Him Alone"... and Oh, is that true in her life!

Laurie taught me so much about living for Christ every waking moment! I remember being at her house for bible study and thinking she was CRAZY for not having cable and not going to the movies. One time, somebody asked her if she was fasting from TV… her response was, "yes, I'm on a life-fast from TV." NO WAY could I EVER live like that! She explained to me that it isn't about saying "NO" to that stuff... it is about saying "YES" to Jesus! The more we draw near to Him and "taste and see that He is good", the more we notice the things of this world are not needed.

Man, did she teach me a LOVE for the Word of God... and to turn off my radio in the car (before cell phones btw!) and memorize scripture... to put verses up all over my house so that I can meditate day and night on Him!

I remember one time when I was feeling sorry for myself about a situation... she told me that we should always "look past the person's behavior and see through to his/her need and then BLESS that need."

She would say "Karen, you need to see this as a chance to die" she would quote John 12:24,25 where Jesus said "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."

She was/is a world traveler... even took Alyssa on her first trip to Africa when she was 13. Laurie has such a heart for the Nations, and it is so fun to sit and listen to her tell stories of what God is doing all over the globe.

Spend just 15 minutes with Laurie and you will know that this woman has been with Jesus! I pray that one day, people can say the same of me.

Thank you Laurie for being such an example of what it means to be filled with the Holy Spirit!

A Tribute... Laura Whitson

2009-09-08T11:00:00.003-04:00

I know the Titus 2 women are supposed to be older, but this next mentor of mine falls into "younger, but wiser" category!

When I met Laura, she was newly married, no children, living in a new city, and her husband Ryan had just become the youth pastor at
our church.

She was only in D-town for about a year... God knew that was all I needed to learn some valuable lessons on being a wife, being humble, but most importantly, Laura exuded an unshakable and unashamed FAITH in God!

I remember us sitting in McDonalds and pulling out our bibles. She had me pick a Psalm and we just prayed through it... read a verse, pray, read a verse, pray... it was uncomfortable at first, but I've loved it ever since!

She also had me make a "Top 10 List"... a list of 10 prayers that I wanted God to answer, but seemed impossible at the time... like my father-in-law being saved (happened June of 2003). That "Top 10 List" was Amazing! I prayed everyday and watched as God either answered my prayer outright or changed My heart about the situation!

That year was a tough one for the Whitsons. Just recently, Kev and I were going through a rough time and a veteran pastor told us "until you walk with a limp, it is hard for God to use you". Ryan and Laura have definitely had their share of struggles, but God has SO used them in SO many lives! I think of the students they had in their youth group that year... Josh, Kacee, Ashley etc... they would all agree that Ryan and Laura layed a solid foundation for their faith in just that one year!

We have stayed in touch over the years, and Laura continues to point me to God through her life! In the last few months they have faced what I am sure has been the hardest season of their lives -- Please take time to read their story at http://emilyjeanstory.blogspot.com. You will be Blessed!

In the midst of all of it, they have continued to SHINE A HUGE SPOTLIGHT on our God!

Thank you Laura for being such an amazing influence in my life!

A Tribute To.... Gretchen

2009-09-07T10:20:00.000-04:00

This friend came into my life at a time when I was completely OVERWHELMED with little ones, with homeschooling, with housekeeping, and most of all up to my eyeballs in fear!
She had a way of knowing how to get my mind off of my troubles, and she could make me laugh more than anyone I had ever known.

She and her husband Sam had a few years on us... and they were both so good about giving Kev and me HOPE for the future!

Gretchen was (and I am sure still is) the QUEEN of organization! She helped me so much with my house. She would come over and we would just go room by room throwing the junk out! Man, did she laugh at me... especially when she found 50 million wet wipes from KFC stashed in my kitchen drawer :)! I am sure the whole process would have made for a great tv show.

The most important lesson I learned from Gretchen was taught by her example alone. She fasted every Wed. for her children and their spouses. At the time, I thought she was crazy... seemed like we always had the parties with the best food on Wed. nights! She was so faithful with that, and her kids were still so young at the time. Only now, is she beginning to see the fruit of her prayers... and based on my facebook stalking, it looks like those prayers have paid off with Sadie :)!

I thank God often for our friendship, and all that I learned in the midst of all the fun that we had together!

If you read this Gretchen, let's get together the next time I am in D-town -- I would love to grab a Diet Pepsi at KFC and sit and chat about old times... and about God's faithfulness through the years!

A Tribute!

2009-09-07T10:02:00.000-04:00

As I am quickly approaching the BIG 4 0, I have been reflecting on God's faithfulness through the years.
He has been so faithful to continue to place older, wiser women in my life... for which I am eternally grateful!
This week I want to tell you about a few of those Titus 2 women that God has used so powerfully to teach me on my journey.

Where is our hope?

2009-08-28T14:50:00.000-04:00

This Morning I had Fox News on while I was getting ready for work.
They had on country singer Darryl Worley singing his song "Sounds Like
Life to Me".
As I was listening to the words (I must say it has a catchy tune!), I
was thinking how at age 39, I can relate:

Sarah’s old car’s about to fall apart
And the washer quit last week
We had to put momma in the nursing home
And the baby’s cutting teeth
I didn’t get much work this week
And I got bills to pay
I said I know this ain’t what you wanna hear
But it’s what I’m gonna say

But... then came the chorus:

Sounds like life to me it ain’t no fantasy
It’s just a common case of everyday reality
Man I know it’s tough but you gotta suck it up
To hear you talk you’re caught up in some tragedy
It sounds like life to me
Here is the second Chorus :

Sounds like life to me plain old destiny
Yeah the only thing for certain is uncertainty
You gotta hold on tight just enjoy the ride
Get used to all this unpredictability
Sounds like life

I understand what he is saying, but I have to ask...
WHERE IS THE HOPE???
Seems like the hope is just simply the fact that everyone else
is going through it too... the old "misery loves company"!
As I was listening, I just became aware of how THANKFUL I am that
because of Jesus Christ, I HAVE HOPE!
My hope is not in this life... it is in the next!

I love Paul's outlook on life when he writes to Timothy in 2 Tim. 4: 6-8..
For I am already being poured out as a drink offering, and the time of my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.

I so pray that we could live lives that aren't the "Normal American Christian" lives, centered on ourselves and our own families. I want us to be focused on, and put our hope in eternity!
I want our children to live lives that are sold out for Christ! He is their only Hope!

I understand now just how much life can hurt, but that is all the more reason to fix our eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith. I want to look out, look upward, and look forward to what is to come!

May we be a people who truly understand that the lives we live here on earth do matter -- and how we spend our lives, and most importantly WHO we put our Hope in here on earth will determine the way in which we spend eternity!

May we encourage each other to be "poured out like a drink offering"!

Facebook Status Updates?

2009-08-27T19:52:00.000-04:00

Celebrating Punk and Orv's 60th wedding anniversary tonight... Little Ceasars Pizza and an all out Punkie Party!!! I put this on my Facebook status and as people began to reply (I get text msgs. when they do), Christian started in on the whole "status update ridicule"...

I think it is a cool way to let people know... who normally wouldn't know... but might just want to know! You should have seen my mom's face light up as I told her person after person that was congratulating them via Facebook status!!! She loved it!

I know that not everyone is too happy with Andrew letting them know EVERY TIME he goes on a run... and EVERY TIME he gets back from a run. I think it is kinda cute though :)!!!

Meet Kessa!

2009-08-21T13:21:00.000-04:00

Well, we did it... or should I say Alyssa did it... or should I say GOD DIT IT?!!!

Grandma Karen and Grandpa Kevin? Pretty crazy!!

Ok, Lance is sitting here beside me as I type this... I am supposed to say... Uncle Drew, Aunt Alayna and most importantly UNCLE LANCE! This is our "family blog" ya know!

What a priviledge to be able to be in the room and watch our baby, with the help of her husband (he did a great job... only had to sit down and breathe once!), and Dr. Stockwell, deliver such a precious little gift from God into this world!

Grandma Jan (Kevin G's Mom) said Kessa Alaine has long fingers which will be great for "basketball"... RRIIGGTTT!!!! I'm thinking more PIANO :)!!

Alyssa asked me to pray with her late last night. I think it is finally hitting her that the worrying just never ends. As we prayed, we just asked God to remind us that He is in control... He loves little Kessa more than we do, and that He gives us just these circumstances so that we will LEAN INTO HIM. Without Faith it is impossible to please God!

It seems like just yesterday that Kevin and I were sitting in the hospital staring at newborn Alyssa (ok, I know, it was pretty close to yesterday). I remember all the emotions and feelings so well.

I have to say.... right now... the way it feels to be a Grandma is better than I could have ever imagined!

Little Lambs

2009-08-19T08:32:00.000-04:00

I am reading Lev. 5 this morning, thinking how crazy it is that they would have to offer up a lamb for unintentional sin -- thinking about the 600 or so laws they lived by -- What must have that been like?!

Then I read Col 3 and am thinking about how we are to live today. We are to seek things above, not things that are on earth. We are to put away anger, wrath, malice, slander etc. and put on compassion, kindness, humility etc. We are to do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Oh, and then it goes on.... Wives submit to your husbands.

As I am reading this, my husband comes in and asks me to check on my Dad. I *Sigh* and get up, not wanting to be interrupted from my precious time with God. I check on Dad, look at the clock and realize I had better walk now (I need the endorphins). STINK! Looks like a huge thunderstorm is coming. When will I get MY walk in? Mom starts to ask question after question about our local radio stations... she need to find Rush Limbaugh. Kevin then comes back into the kitchen and asks if I can make his lunch... another big *SIGH*... which leads to not the most pleasent interaction.

OK, so in just that short amount of time... how many little lambs would have I had to bring to the priest????

I pray that for today, I can set my mind on things that are above not on things that are on earth. I can realize that I have died and my life is hidden with Christ IN God. Because of the sacrifice that Christ made once and for all -- I do not have to have a back yard full of little lambs just to take care of this morning's sins!

I am FREE to let the peace of Christ rule in my heart.... and I AM THANKFUL!!!

For today, may we:

Col. 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in us richly, teaching one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with THANKFULNESS in our hearts to God.

Let's try this!

2009-08-18T11:35:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I am so good at starting something, and then not seeing it to completion...

Probably why I have hesitated so much on starting this whole blog thing!

I am also not sure how to make this page look "cool"...

That's where my kids come in!

So much is happening in our house right now.

Mom and Dad are here while Dad rehabs from his total knee replacement.

Alyssa just called and things are moving with this baby.... anytime now :)!

Isn't just like God to have us in geriatric ministry and new baby mode at the same time???

Such a picture of life!

Thanks for stopping by...

It's good to have an outlet for my thoughts (other than facebook status!).